I learned something really sobering recently, which is that the average American spends between 6 and 7 hours ~a day~ on screens. That’s 99 days a year—oh, excuse me, that math doesn’t acknowledge sleep. It’s actually 198 *waking days* a year. Yes, literally over half a year.
This completely shocked me. I LOVE a screen. Or two. Or four. On the floor.
People outside of book publishing are always scandalized to realize that people in book publishing don’t usually read in their down time (especially on weeknights). It’s one in a long list of examples of how we romanticize this business. Teachers don’t teach in their off time; surgeons don’t operate. I guess I’ve known finance people who go home and count their money, but that’s a whole other thing. The reality is, editors are usually drowning in manuscripts and submissions, and at the end of the day, we just want to zone the f out.
I LOVE TV, and will watch literally anything with the enthusiasm of a child who was only allowed to watch television for half-an-hour a day until she turned 14 (which I was). Historically, I am a night watcher—I will usually only permit myself to turn on the television once the sun goes down (so yes, I watch about twice as much television in the cold months as I do in the warm ones).
When I met my husband, TV became a way for us to hang out when we were talked out. Before we had a table, it was something for us to look at while we ate on the floor; we’d turn on a show while we chewed, watch for a few hours, then go to bed.
Over time, this morphed into one of our chief comfort rituals. We became devoted connoisseurs of lengthy series (4 seasons or more) so we wouldn’t have to choose our television at night (the hardest of all choices). Watching an episode without the other person became a kind of marital infidelity. It’s cozy and easy. During hard times, it has kept us going.
This television watching routine quickly became the gateway to an instagram obsession. I’m less on my phone during the day, but at night. AT NIGHT! I love me some pet videos. Or ASMR videos. Or hydraulic press videos, jiggling-pastries-containing-100-egg-yoke-videos, Taylor Swift fan videos, girl-pregnant-with-her-third-kid-before-19-speaking-out-against-her-haters videos, large-musical-families-living-under-one-roof videos, astrology-meets-social-justice videos, Irish twin dancing videos, ballet shoe breaking-in videos, yarn spinning videos—in the words of Sharpay from HSM3, I want it all.
After reading that terrifying statistic, I started to notice how often I am on my phone while I’m watching TV—I basically spend my nights staring into a flashlight with T.V. playing in the background. And then I started to notice… it’s not just at night. When I wake up in the morning, I often open my phone to check my outlook, then black out and wind up accidentally binging instagram videos while my coffee gets cold.
For so many of us lockdown aggressively lowered our inhibitions around endless scrolling as Instagram became our main window into the world. Like a sweatpants-clad Belle from Beauty and the Beast, the images I was seeing in the magic mirror in my hand had took on deeper significance. This wasn’t just voyeurism; it was staying involved with my broader community. And a dependency developed, the way babies develop a mood-regulating habit with a pacifier.
I don’t know that all the hours I have spent electronically mollifying myself over the last three years could have turned into something better, but I know some of them could have. I do know that I don’t want to spend over half of my life on a screen! And neither do you, creator reading this newsletter.
For what it’s worth, I don’t think a seismic shift is required; small measures can make a big difference. For the last few nights, I’ve been putting my phone in another room while watching T.V. The first night was really annoying, and I ended up cheating by intermittently using Kevin’s phone. But by the second night, I felt calmer. I actually felt my tiredness at the end of a long day. And something amazing happened: without the phone light confusing my melatonin levels, I was ready to shut off the television after two episodes. I did not want to keep going. I did not feel bereft.
It’s strange how insidious these things are, and how they happen accidentally over time. Stay vigilant, friends. Count the hours. Watch where they go.
Wishing you all a pleasant and healthy weekend!
xx
Emma
Slippery slope on a screen